The struggles of life tend to keep me pretty occupied, but the Holy Spirit lately has given me a gift that we all have available for the asking – the ability to “see” love. I didn’t ask for this gift, didn’t know how helpful it would be (God must have figured I needed it), but I will certainly ask God to grant me this again and again, particularly when the chips are down and I need a little bucking up. Two new grandchildren came into this world, Grace and Max. Well, of course, you might say, who doesn’t love a new baby! But, I saw the intense love their mothers had for them before they were born and that got me to remembering the love I had for my own children from the moment I knew they existed. I saw their mother’s stroke their swelling tummies, express a deep knowledge and intimate communion with their little ones, and a longing to finally see them and teach them about love.
My father-in-law experienced a bad fall this past month, a difficult occurrence for a man of 94 years. Here again, at the farthest span of our time here on earth, the love shown him filled me with a sense that this is what our Father in Heaven had in mind when He created us. My husband and his brother and sisters took over the supervision of his care, sat by his bedside after his surgery for hip replacement, held his hand, helped him to eat, calmed him, cheered him, laughed with him, wept for him. Our children, and nieces and nephews flocked to their grandpa’s side to visit, to spend the long nights with him as their parent’s slept, recharging for another day. He is doing pretty well now, still in a transitional nursing home, still deluged with the love of his children, grandchildren and great grand children. Grandpa, for his part, even in times of great stress, worried that there were not enough chairs for everyone in his small hospital room. Even in his drug induced state he talked of borrowing $6 from one grandson to send out for hamburgers to feed his guests. Oh, this is love, and this family has had his example of love for generations. Thank you, grandpa.
During this time that grandpa’s life hung in the balance, our 7 children called daily (that’s a lot of phone calls!) to see how he was and how we were doing. They knew their dad was spending many hours with grandpa before, during and after work and they were concerned for him too. We felt so incredibly blessed and wrapped in caring arms every time the phone rang.
I saw love in the Eucharistic chapel the other night. There you go again, you say, of course! But, this was in a new way for me. Without a doubt, Love Himself is in the small dimly lit chapel. But a person came in, positioned himself in the front row and from his rapt attention and the movement of his lips (no sound) I could see that he was in deep conversation with Jesus. He listened, he answered, he smiled, raised his hands, perhaps conceding a point. I tried not to watch this man in his private conversation with God, but realized that I was gifted to witness this human exchange between man and Love that we often are not privy to nor can we totally comprehend. I was able to realize a little more fully that God is present there.
I went to Texas for several days to see and hold baby Max (and help out a bit), and I missed my husband. When I talked to him on the phone, I was reminded of our courting days some 43 years ago. We’d run out of things to talk about and didn’t want to hang up the phone, couldn't bear to break the connection. I remember thinking when we married that I could not love him any more than I did at that time. Silly child, our love just grows and grows and now I know that married life is a journey in love. As creatures created by Love in the intense love exchange of the Holy Trinity, we are fashioned in the image of our Creator. We are created to love. We flourish in it. We are at our very best when we love and, we see the best in others when we recognize their capacity to love and the ways they show it.
As Christmas approaches and our families gather to celebrate the birth of Love Himself, I think often of those who are no longer with us on earth, my Mom and Dad, Grandparents, etc. I remind myself that love “endures all things” 1Cor.13:7 – even death. At Mass, during the Eucharistic Prayer, I feel the love of those who have passed from this world and exist in the perfect love of God, still loving me, even more intensely than they were capable of here on earth. May you “see” love this Christmas season in family and friends and may you “be” love to all you meet. May your Christmas season be filled with love and the knowledge that this “loving” is what life is all about. (Grandpa is in the nursing home and doing well. Sometimes he is reliving in the past and sometimes sharp as a tack! His family visit often and husband Mike takes him a donut every morning.
He is teaching us love and compassion and the value of every life!
Grandpa Edmund Gaida
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